Shopping List for the Week of 04/23/12

Is... this the curtain dress from Gone With The Wind?

This. Just… This. It’s everything I need in my life right now.

Welcome back, dear reader, to This Week In – my weekly column about the releases of all things awesome. I hope that the weekend treated you well, and that – unlike me – you were not inundated with late night food orders from the lovely people celebrating 4/20. So, I am going to imagine that derpy pug saying all of Scarlett O’Hara’s lines, and try to focus on all the great things happening this week.


This week, there’s nothing I would describe myself as “stoked” about, if I were the kind of guy that said words like that. There are, however, new releases from Eve 6, who are apparently still a Thing. There is also a new effort from Santigold, which could be interesting, and from the Dandy Warhols – the folks behind the Veronica Mars theme song.

And of course, last but probably not least, there is also Jack White’s new solo album, and from what I’ve heard of it, it’s pretty legit.


This week sees a number of diverse releases, and while there is a bit of something for anyone, I’m not sure there’s anything for everyone, if you know what I mean.

On the Action front, we have ‘Safe,’ with Jason Statham, which literally looks exactly frame-by-frame identical to The Transporter/Every-Jason-Statham-Movie-Ever. But, you know, some people go for that, so go with God.

For Children, we have ‘The Pirates! Band of Misfits,’ from the creators of ‘Chicken Run’ and ‘Wallace and Gromit,’ which are distinctly British in their humor – for better and for worse. This movie does not appeal to me, but then I’m not a father, so take that into consideration.

In Horror, we have ‘The Raven,’ in which some sort of Edgar Allan Poe Swimfan creates terrifying tortures based on Pop Culture’s Greatest Goth (yeah I said it, Emily Dickinson. What you gonna do about it??) My brother legitimately believes that casting John Cusack as E.A.P. is a legitimate crime against humanity, and should be punished accordingly.

And the week’s biggest release will undoubtedly be ‘The Five-Year Engagement,’ starring Jason Segal, Emily Blunt, and – best of all – Alison Brie aka Little Annie Aderol from Community. This movie looks pretty funny (though not hysterical), and will probably be the one I actually see out of all the above.


Things are winding down and heating up! On one side, we have finales happening, lowering the number of things to watch each week. At the same time, finales are coming, so all the best drama is sure to come!

Monday – Please. Eureka. Go out with a bang (both in terms of plot and viewership).

Tuesday – Glee pays tribute to Whitney Houston. New Girl sees more Nick angst… yay… but also more Schmidt/CeCe hijinks and more Russell who needs to stay forever.

Wednesday – REVENGE. While the show could have come back from hiatus with a bit stronger episode, it’s neatly set the stage for the final act of the season, and it continues to keep me guessing week after week. Also, Don’t Trust the B— is actually pretty funny. Not LOL-worthy yet, but worth a watch or two.

Thursday – Community does Law & Order. Do you need to know anything else??? Also, Awake continues to need support!

Friday – FRINGE. Guys. GUYS. This last episode LITERALLY CHANGED EVERYTHING. It was like a pilot for an entirely new show, and it WAS AWESOME. I just need this show to get high enough ratings to get 13 final episodes to close everything. Also, Supernatural, which has been “blah” lately, will be guest-starring FELICIA DAY aka my probable Number 1 crush, so I will be on that like white on rice.

And as always, Mad Men and Game of Thrones.


The Marvel Universe is knee-deep in Avengers vs. X-Men, so if that isn’t your thing, STEER CLEAR. But X-Men Legacy is new, and still pre-AVX, so I’ll get that.

Over at DC, we’ve got Aquaman, which – don’t laugh – is legitimately fantastic. It knows you doubt it, and takes that and runs with it, and has made it its mission statement to change your mind. I for one, am sold. There’s also new I, Vampire and Justice League Dark, which are crossing over in awesome ways right now. Yes, it’s vampires. No, cool ones.

We’ve also got new Angel & Faith – continuing the story with the Newly-Sane Drusilla. Guess what? She’s creepier than ever!

And that about sums it up! This Week In: Tellurian Things, we’ve got a post on Sports from Jordan, and a post on FOOD from my friend Griffin, who is basically a culinary wizard. So, stick around and let’s finish April strong!


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